i downloaded grindr just after pokemon go
was released so naturally i pretended to be my favourite pokemon, eevee
convo 1
OMG a
pokemon!
imma catch u
um no thx
what u
already got an owner?
no I’m a wild grasser for lyf
also not down with the whole capture
n imprison pokemon just to make em fight
against their will. ya feel?
Lol im
talking to an eevee
Quite
Face pic?
Theres one on my profile
No, real
face pic
Look Im an Eevee so thats my face
Ok then im
articuno
Omigod ur so rare
amazin to meet u articuno
yeah n this
water and flying type is flyin away
articuno is flying / ice bro
and u never
gonna fuck me
err that took a weird turn but sure
im okay with that
[sends a pic
of his butt and then blocks eevee]
convo 2
R u into
older bottoms?
imma pokemon so dunno what
that means fam soz
what????????
Look this is me
Ur a
cartoon???
Imma eevee
my husband
and i r into BDSM
Good for u
u wanna be
spit-roast & whipped?
Pretty sure interspecies pokemon
bestiality is like, well illegal m8
im 63
congrats im level five
u must’ve beaten a lotta gyms
u do chems?
does rare candy count?
ur not takin
it srsly bye then
convo 3
eevee is ma
fave
caught one
today
congrats fam. treat it well or
i’ll come at ya like a gyardos usin dragon rage
what u want
to be when
ur older
eevee?
dunno. happy would be nice but
ill settle for well fed
lol
what u wanna
evolve into
urgh well that’s a lot of effort u feel?
like for half of em I need to find magic
stones which are rare af and the rest
I need to become good friends with a trainer
during the day or night like no thx not worth
it just to get a glam mermaid tail or whatev
what made u
make this profile
like why be
eevee
I am eevee
ok but the
guy behind
the profile
why pick a pokemon
on a gay
hook-up app?
for the lols. on here ppl either get the joke
or they have no idea whats going on. its just
for my own amusement.
rly?
I guess its also a reaction to the shallowness
of this thing like ur just scrolling through a face
mosaic thinkin ‘I could do better’ judging ppl
on their eyes or abs n like i cant do that
I dont think i can put my face up for judgement
n not get like knocked evrytime someon doesnt
reply cos i know all their goin on is my face like
thats too personal to broadcast to every other
gay guy in the area, on a place where ur very presence
means ‘i am alone’. so i have my fun bein an eevee
to avoid rejection and the lowering of self-worth
that comes with it
wanna suck
my dick?
sure
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