It’s hard to know what I used to do when I had a spare thought
What did I do to procrastinate? When work wasn’t frought
But the truth is its being there is a distraction in itself
My productivity ceases as the papers mount my shelf
My inbox less important than this time consuming app
Wondering who is close by and if he’s a handsome chap
The urge to see if that man appearing next to me
Is a face, a torso, blank image or maybe he’s a she
If he’s after, sex, love or dates and better still can host
Seems to be the question I ask now more regular than most
But this urge I have to see these men and if they like my pic
Affects the tasks I’m paid to do and makes me call in sick
These many men defining themselves by their listed tribe
Makes me think I understand them and think I get their vibe
But the truth is all these hours spent checking who is keen
Are affecting my performance and my boss is turning mean
Only last week himself a member told me he that It has to stop
If you keep trawling that app all day I’m giving you the chop
But these threats do not scare me and I am prepared to sue
If he can spend all day on it and then surely I can too
That drunken chat between us both and those photos of his cock
Could end up in the wrong hands and give his boss a shock
In reality he can do nothing as I continue playing this blinder
With one eye on the job I do and the other one on Grindr
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